WELCOME TO THE SITE OF THE PREMIER DARTS CHAMPIONSHIP IN THIS PART OF THE U.K.
DICK CHEYNEY AND GEORGE W BUSH WERE HAVING BREAKFAST IN THE WHITE HOUSE. THE WAITREE ASKED MR CHEYNEY WHAT HE WOULD LIKE, TO BE TOLD "A BOWL OF OAT MEAL, AND A CUP OF COFFEE, PLEASE"....." AND FOR YOU, MR PRESIDENT ?". GEORGE W, WITH THAT ANNOYING WINK OF HIS SAID, "HOW ABOUT A QUICKY THIS MORNING ?". "OH, MR BUSH, YOU`RE NO BETTER THAN THAT MR CLINTON" WITH THAT SHE RUSHED OFF, SOBBING. CHEYNEY LEANED ACROSS TO MR BUSH AND QUIETLY SAID, " ITS PRONOUNCED QUICHE, GEORGE, QUICHE"
A WOMAN GETS ON A BUS WITH HER NEW BABY. THE DRIVER SEES THEM AND SAYS " THATS THE UGLIEST BABY I HAVE EVER SEEN". THE WOMAN TAKES HER TICKET AND SITS DOWN ALONGSIDE ANOTHER PASSENGER, TELLING HIM THAT " THE THE DRIVER HAD JUST INSULTED ME ". THE PASSENGER SAID, "WELL, GO BACK AND GIVE HIM WHAT FOR,....I`LL HOLD YOUR MONKEY "
MY WIFE HAD A GO AT ME LAST NIGHT. SHE SAID " THE WAY YOU CARRY ON,YOU`LL DRIVE ME TO MY GRAVE"....I HAD THE CAR OUT IN 30 SECONDS
I SAW SIX MEN KICKING & PUNCHING MY MOTHER IN LAW RECENTLY. MY NEIGHBOUR SAID "ARE YOU GOING TO HELP ?" I SAID, "NO, SIX OUGHT TO BE ENOUGH"
FOUR MEN GO GOLFING. THREE START BRAGGING ABOUT THEIR SONS.
ONE SAYS "MY SON IS A BUILDER; HES SO SUCCESSFUL HE GAVE A FRIEND A NEW HOME"
THE SECOND SAYS " MY SON OWNS A CAR DEALERSHIP. HES SO SUCCESSFUL THAT HE GAVE A FRIEND TWO B M Ws"
THE THIRD BRAGGED "MY SON IS A STOCKBROKER AND SO SUCCESSFUL THAT HE GAVE HIS FRIEND AN ENTIRE PORTFOLIO"
THE FOURTH JUST SHRUGS, "MY SON IS GAY. I`M NOT TOTALLY THRILLED ABOUT IT. BUT HE MUST BE GOOD. HIS LAST THREE BOYFRIENDS GAVE HIM A HOUSE, TWO CARS AND A SHARE PORTFOLIO".
AND FINALLY, DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE TWO HOMSEXUAL BURGLARS ?. THEY BROKE IN AND REARRANGED THE FURNITURE
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DICK CHEYNEY AND GEORGE W BUSH WERE HAVING BREAKFAST IN THE WHITE HOUSE. THE WAITREE ASKED MR CHEYNEY WHAT HE WOULD LIKE, TO BE TOLD "A BOWL OF OAT MEAL, AND A CUP OF COFFEE, PLEASE"....." AND FOR YOU, MR PRESIDENT ?". GEORGE W, WITH THAT ANNOYING WINK OF HIS SAID, "HOW ABOUT A QUICKY THIS MORNING ?". "OH, MR BUSH, YOU`RE NO BETTER THAN THAT MR CLINTON" WITH THAT SHE RUSHED OFF, SOBBING. CHEYNEY LEANED ACROSS TO MR BUSH AND QUIETLY SAID, " ITS PRONOUNCED QUICHE, GEORGE, QUICHE"
A WOMAN GETS ON A BUS WITH HER NEW BABY. THE DRIVER SEES THEM AND SAYS " THATS THE UGLIEST BABY I HAVE EVER SEEN". THE WOMAN TAKES HER TICKET AND SITS DOWN ALONGSIDE ANOTHER PASSENGER, TELLING HIM THAT " THE THE DRIVER HAD JUST INSULTED ME ". THE PASSENGER SAID, "WELL, GO BACK AND GIVE HIM WHAT FOR,....I`LL HOLD YOUR MONKEY "
MY WIFE HAD A GO AT ME LAST NIGHT. SHE SAID " THE WAY YOU CARRY ON,YOU`LL DRIVE ME TO MY GRAVE"....I HAD THE CAR OUT IN 30 SECONDS
I SAW SIX MEN KICKING & PUNCHING MY MOTHER IN LAW RECENTLY. MY NEIGHBOUR SAID "ARE YOU GOING TO HELP ?" I SAID, "NO, SIX OUGHT TO BE ENOUGH"
FOUR MEN GO GOLFING. THREE START BRAGGING ABOUT THEIR SONS.
ONE SAYS "MY SON IS A BUILDER; HES SO SUCCESSFUL HE GAVE A FRIEND A NEW HOME"
THE SECOND SAYS " MY SON OWNS A CAR DEALERSHIP. HES SO SUCCESSFUL THAT HE GAVE A FRIEND TWO B M Ws"
THE THIRD BRAGGED "MY SON IS A STOCKBROKER AND SO SUCCESSFUL THAT HE GAVE HIS FRIEND AN ENTIRE PORTFOLIO"
THE FOURTH JUST SHRUGS, "MY SON IS GAY. I`M NOT TOTALLY THRILLED ABOUT IT. BUT HE MUST BE GOOD. HIS LAST THREE BOYFRIENDS GAVE HIM A HOUSE, TWO CARS AND A SHARE PORTFOLIO".
AND FINALLY, DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THE TWO HOMSEXUAL BURGLARS ?. THEY BROKE IN AND REARRANGED THE FURNITURE
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